What boxes cannot hold

Boxes are not always as open as this picture portends.  Boxes can hold a lot of things.  I have been digesting all the things that boxes cannot hold.

'Thinking outside of the box'  is a popular anecdote for finding creative solutions to a problem, or to problems that will happen down the road. This box represents the structure of one's day to day life.  This structure provides comfort by the fabrication of the illusion that life will be very much the same tomorrow. In other words, to sum up, thinking outside of the box is at least; thinking from a different perspective, a helpful perspective.

I was raised in a conservative baptist home.  I set my alarm and was awakened every morning hours before school. I made a commitment to myself to read the Bible through, to try to see what life is all about. To examine and process outside of church. I continually ran into a God that was far removed from any of the frail boxes in which I begin to find myself.

As a young adult, I discovered that I was somehow trapped within layers and layers of boxes.  Boxes which defined right and wrong, God's will, how to act, how to live, what to judge, the framework for how to view God.  Every time I went to church (4-5 times a week) the boxes were manufactured and reinforced.  School, home, work, church, were making boxes like it was their industry.  I started to mint my own boxes for many different reasons.  My perspective here is negative, but it bears mentioning that many of these boxes were a necessity to me.

I was able to push through abuse, school, work, and into the Marine Corps because of boxes.  The trouble with boxes is that they don't grow.  They hold a finite amount of...stuff.  I grew but my boxes did not.  I had to grow, my world expanded exponentially when I left home and started out haphazardly.

Most of the people I have encountered in my pioneering journey did not understand me at all, and vice versa.

Let's skip ahead to today.  Now I seem to revel in bursting out of these boxes.  It wasn't too long ago that I realized that God didn't fit in any box, especially not the nice, safe, comfortable box I have seen people put him in for so long.  The next logical realization is that I do not fit into any box either.  The bad part about boxes is that they not only limit one's perspective, we give them the power and authority to limit our lives.

What doesn't fit in boxes?  Love!  Love for others (seen in consideration and charity) Love for oneself, and the most socially acceptable use of the word: Romantic love (the sum of the previous two plus a little something extra).

Can love be legislated?  Can we create  rules that make love happen?  My discovery is that the inverse is true.  The more rules we create; the less love happens.  People get married with some basic rules embodied in the vows they make to each other.  If every act has to be scheduled and mandatory does that allow love to grow?  Spontaneously picking up a pretty bouquet can be a fun, familiar way of showing a person that you love them.  What if picking up a pretty bouquet is scheduled for every Monday, and Monday is the only day one picks it up and presents it?  Does it express the same love?  Is the expression of love greater because of this new rule?

How I answer these questions allows me (and perhaps you) to get a peek at 'my' (your) boxes.  The wonderful thing that I am finding?  Love doesn't require rules, it naturally exceeds the standards of rules.

My significant other may feel upset if I don't ever get flowers.  A rule doesn't need to be made to govern flowers, because I pick up flowers spontaneously out of consideration (love) for my spouse, because I know that my spouse likes them.

The search for deeper truth isn't about exploring religion, but growing out of the boxes that are limiting one's love.

I gain a greater respect for the other inhabitants of this planet, when I realize, they, just like me are all  trapped in boxes. Some try to burst out, some need the boxes to survive or to push through tough times.